Nomad

As I write this I’m sitting in my Aunt’s condo in Freeport Bahamas. I’m working from the kitchen table and when I glance up I can see treetops, neighboring homes and the ocean just beyond it all.  I’ve been here for one week with a week left to go. The life of a digital nomad has been calling me for a while now so I’ve decided to test it out in small doses. It’s amazing the clarity you receive when you remove some factors from your life and change your scenery. Here’s what I’ve discovered so far:

1.  I don’t miss my life back home. This one is hitting me hard. For a while now I’ve been rebelling against the booked and busy life while simultaneously dreaming of life abroad. I’m surprised I’ve been in Atlanta this long though some of that is largely attributed to not knowing where I want to go next.  Like a kid who doesn’t want to go to bed but is super sleepy, I’ve been throwing inner tantrums lately. I cannot do all the things, I don’t want to and I’m not sure I want to do all the things I’ve currently got going on now. Leaving home and coming to a new place has reinforced all of this and has me asking HOW I’ll be able to go home again and what that will look like for me. Friends, relationships, daily rituals – it all has to change.

2.  Wow are my feet swollen. I know this isn’t really a life lesson but listen here Linda, the way these feet swell on a daily?!? I can’t even wear socks sometimes. I remember a friend who lived for years in Dubai discussing the difference in food quality and seasoning in comparison to the U.S. Watching my feet swell immediately after eating something I’m reminded of this and I’m amazed.

3.  I need to get back to therapy. Daily I’m unpacking something about myself, my life, what I want it to look like next and digging into the root of that thought. My old therapist stopped practicing in November for health reasons and I’ve yet to find a suitable replacement. I need to keep trying so I can have help working through all this stuff.

4.  I take a lot of pride in my self-care and I thought I was doing a good job, even if I wasn’t being consistent all the time. Being here, truly doing what feels right, going with my intuition, taking intentional time out for me has helped me realize I suck at putting myself first.

5.  I will spend the money on me first, PERIODT. When I turned 40 I came up with a financial plan that included investments, savings and properties. I still want all of those things but the money has to be invested in myself first.  If I’m not taking care of myself than any other goal I set won’t matter because I won’t be able to enjoy it.

6.  Bahamians are so nice, I’m such an asshole. I’m not really an asshole but I do see ways in which I can be kinder to myself and to others. And as much as I hate when men tell me to smile, I need to smile more.

7.  Life needs to feel more like leisure. So much of my life feels like work, responsibility and a heavy load that I drag everywhere like a bag lady. And yes I know that’s adulting but there are people being whole adults out here without letting it weight them down. I aspire to that level of adulthood.  

Author: Cherrón